Tuesday, July 31, 2007

I hate futons

That's right. I hate them. Yes, it is a serious word. And I mean it.

I helped a friend move today. I'm happy to do it, because with good friends you always know what comes around goes around. Plus, moving is one of those things where you notice how much faster and efficient it goes when you have a group of people helping.

Futons are the worst things ever conceived and constructed. I've always hated everything about them. They are not comfortable to sit on. They are certainly not comfortable to sleep on. But, it is moving day when my hatred for futons really comes out.

When you try and pick the thing up, one side tries to fold over and slice off and/or crush your fingers. As you and the other sorry soul who is trying to carry the thing with you attempt to rotate only slightly to get out the door, then the other side slams down. Why isn't there some sort of fastening device included with this overly-complicated folding monstrosity?

And that's just the frame. Then the so-called mattress. If there is any piece of furniture that, when carried, resembles a dead body it must be the futon mattress.

I'm not sure why, but i assumed the futon was invented by the Swedish or someone else in northern Europe, but apparently it is a Japanese idea. I have no basis for saying this, but I bet the Japanese futons are better somehow. Not good by any means....but better.

I hate futons.

If anyone has anything to say in defense of futons.....I would like to hear it.


image above from here

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hmmm, interesting. You are confusing a rock with its environment, or semething like that. A futon is a mattress, very old in form and function, and, I might add, one of the best sleeping devices ever devised by man. If a futon were ever to try to slice your hand off, then we'd have a story! The futon FRAME, however, is a modern (probably Am.) afterthought, quite silly and useless, especially to
an (admitted) purist.

PS I hate futon frames also!

Brian said...

yes....interesting, indeed.

okay then, the distinction between the frame and mattress is now established.

even so...i find it difficult to accept those mattresses being "one of the best sleeping devices ever devised by man".....but, I fully acknowledge that I (1) have never tried a good one and (2) am jaded and bitter due to my hatred for the frame!